The rough life I lead

Three days of work, five day weekend (at the sunny and impossibly blue North Coast).
Two days of work, and then tomorrow--back to the beach! I'm actually quite lucky to have returned to Cairo early, during Ramadan and for the Eid holiday, since the workload is incredibly low and we get so much time off. It's been a nice transition, but I am worried it's making me lazy.

I was there. And tomorrow, I return!

The best part of the past two weeks has not been the beach, but instead all the awesome people I've been meeting.  Friends of friends, people on the street and at my gym, just about everywhere. A fellow SAISer who is in town for about a week introduced me to one of his friends, the one who was awesome enough to let me crash their bro-mance outing to the North Coast. His friends are hilarious. One likes country enough to have some songs on his iPod (at first I thought he was messing with me). Another is just so funny and all we do is make fun of each other--I put ice down his swimsuit and he called me fat.  My favorite moment so far was laying in the grass with a bunch of new friends at the beachhouse, looking at the stars, listening to the waves, and generally goofing around. Seriously, so amazing.

 Despite how awesome everything has been, there have been incidents that highlight the fact that all is not well.  Harassment spikes during Eid--apparently some men think in return for being pious for a month they can be douches during the holiday. A friend walked me home last night after a movie, but we had some not too pleasant encounters.  I was worried mostly for him, because I knew if something were to happen he would have to step in for me.  Also, I also had to ditch a taxi who was driving me around for too long, asking for my number and being a creeper. 

The good outweighs the bad, however, and I think that is something lost during a lot of the talk about Egypt and harassment. Because while there are some men who suck, I have met many, many more who are just awesome, funny, and want to ensure this crazy khawaga (foreigner) is safe.

Taqeef! It's a Ramadan Miracle!

I have air conditioning.  It's Tuesday night (technically Wednesday morning), I arrived on Sunday, and tonight is the first night I have air conditioning in my room.  I arrived to my flat Sunday night after a long trip and met my roommate--she seems super nice. The flat is incredibly central, off of Talaat Harb, which, for those unfamiliar with Cairo, is about three minutes walk from Tahrir Square, of the revolutionary fame.  I wanted to live Downtown, as opposed to the areas that are more "expat-y" because I wanted to break out of the expat bubble.  If I'm going to live in Egypt, then damnit, I'm going to live in Egypt.

But the AC in my room did not work.  I was so tired the first night I just aimed a (not working-well) fan at my face and passed out, sweating the whole night.  I woke up around noon, thinking something along the lines of, "WTF did I get myself into?" I went to see the landlord, who said a repairman would come tomorrow to fix it. Meanwhile, he gave me the keys to another flat, whose AC wasn't working either.  I texted him telling him this is unacceptable and I'm moving unless the AC is fixed tomorrow. He called, apologized profusely for the "disrespect" (you were disrespecting me?? Badeen), and said if it was not fixed tonight he would buy me another.

I did not mention to him that now my roommate and I want to move into the other flat, provided they fix the AC. It is a little more expensive, but still cheap for the area and has these amazing balconies. And shower curtains. And garbage cans. And coffee cups! All things this flat is lacking.

The guy literally gave my AC unit a shower. My room feels cool right now, so hey, I guess whatever works.

Our doorman was helping the repairman.  Seeing the interaction between the two really made the social distinctions in Egypt evident.  The repairman was wearing nice Western clothes (not like in the States--in fact, here the job title translates to "engineer"), nice hair cut, generally well-put together. Spoke no English but I could understand his Arabic. Our doorman wears traditional garb, I think something is wrong with his eyes, and I can't for the life of me understand what he's saying. But the repairman made the doorman carry the AC in and out of my room on his back. The doorman also was carrying all of his tools, and generally acting very subservient.  

Yesterday, my one free day between arrival and work, was hot and stressful. I was trying to work out the AC, went to another neighborhood for a proper grocery store, and visited a few gyms.  That night I met up with my friend Hiba, who I met on a flight to Beirut. She coincidentally was in Cairo this week--definitely one of those people who you meet and just click with. That's why I love traveling and crossing paths with people whom you would never meet otherwise, sharing experiences and stories and keeping in touch long after.

And today--my first day at work! So far I really enjoy it. I'm sitting in a room with three other girls, all Egyptian, doing similar work.  They said after a month or so I can move to a separate office, which I find kind of weird.  They have all been there longer, know the ropes better--why should I get the separate office? Makes me uneasy. I joined a Gold's Gym on a permanent boat on the Nile--SO NICE! I love it and am so excited. I think there is even Zumba! After the gym I met up with a SAISer at her friend's houseboat. Yes, a houseboat.

Now it is past 1am and it is time for bed. Goodnight!

Fiji: Not just beautiful beaches

Yes, I’m in Fiji. I flew to meet up with my sister, Chrissy, who just finished up a semester in New Zealand. I am SO excited to see her. I can’t believe it’s been about six months.

I arrived on Saturday morning, but my bags did not.  It’s Monday morning right now and I am still bagless. Luckily I’ve been able to borrow a bunch of stuff from Chrissy. I arrived in Nadi, the city with the main airport, and we ate breakfast before heading to the airport to catch a flight to our next stop, Suva. 

I’m using this chance to not only work on my tan, but to learn more about Fiji, the culture, the politics, etc. Because that’s how I do.  Right now we’re in Suva, the cultural capital and the seat of the Fijian government. We’re going to be here for about three days. I planned this leg of the trip to get away from the beaches and into real Fijian life.  It’s a nice little town, with malls, restaurants, markets, etc. 

It’s really a fascinating place.  The country is divided basically between Indo-Fijians (descendants of indentured servants from India) and indigenous Fijians.  It’s a two-tier system, with indigenous being first-class citizens and Indo-Fijians second class.  The two-tier system is codified by law, an example of which being Indo-Fijians are not allowed to own land.  After indentured servitude was banned in 1919, many Indo-Fijians went on to buy the land from their former owners and became the business leaders in the country. They faced a backlash from the indigenous, and that’s how we got to where we are today.

The Indian culture here is really strong.  All the stores carry saris, bangles, and salwar khameeses. I’m trying really hard not to buy it all. The cinema here in Suva, the cultural capital of Fiji, is showing a Bollywood film. I really want to see it tonight. Last night Chrissy and I ate Indian food. Delicious!

Fijians are genuinely nice and open. You walk down the street and nearly everyone who passes you by says, “Bula!” or, “Welcome/hello!” Everyone is smiling and wants to talk to you.  It’s much different from other places I’ve traveled, where you can’t really meet anyone’s eyes (i.e. Egypt, because the men will think you’re hitting on them).  A few men give us that smile, but for the most part I honestly am not getting the creeper vibe. It’s really nice. 

Also, people here actually drink Fiji water. I thought it was just a marketing ploy…

Generational changes in Qatar: "We want to see change happening"

"Education is a tool to work, to change, to keep us moving and growing," said Marwa.

My classmates and I were in a meeting with students from the University of Qatar.  After around of introductions, the students asked us one thing we were most curious about in Qatari culture.  I had asked about the major differences between their generation and that of their parents.

"Our parents used to go directly to the labor market," Marwa said."Now we can continue our education-our parents nag us to continue. It is better to face the labor market with a university degree than with a secondary degree.  They have higher standards for us."

While her mother was a housewife, it is normal for girls to go to work. Ten years ago, it was not allowed for youth and women in particular to travel, whereas now the Qatari government pays for many students to study abroad. The change was not only coming from above, she argued, but also from within their own families as more and more supported their girls' participation in the public realm.

The influence of society and others is strong in pushing the Qatari youth, and women in particular, into higher education and the workforce. 

"Our parents see the difference, ask us to grow more, to not be like the but better."

The Arab Spring also inspired the students to act and voice their opinions, explained Khalid.  It made them aware of what's happening in the Middle East.

"I want to go to Tahrir and see things happening," he said.  I watch al-Jazeera Mubasher (an Egyptian tv channel) every night to see what's going on.  People debate on campus who should win the Egyptian elections."

He thinks, "unfortunately" Morsi, the Islamist candidate, will win.  Marwa piped in, saying Morsi was the better candidate.

Despite the differences of opinions, it was clear both students shared the boy's sentiment that "We want to see change happening."

The students echoed the idea there were no problems with Qatari society.  "I am happy with the current situation and eager to see what happens next," said Marwa.

Qatari society evolved at a feverish rate, with Doha growing out of the desert in a matter of decades as a largely Bedouin society a more urban, modern, and diverse lifestyle.  These changes brought great wealth, education, and healthcare.  But not all the changes were good. 

For one thing, one of the girls expressed apprehension about teenagers meeting and flirting online without the possibility of parental oversight. 

"I am afraid because it's not something I'm used to," Marwa fretted.

There is also the problem of laborers.  Now parents are afraid to allow their children to go out to play.  The situation is now largely rectified, said one of the girls, because the government mandated the laborers move into camps away from Qataris. 

The girls expressed their disappointment about how the world viewed them, many of which are covered. 

"We may cover our faces but we don't cover our minds," said Dalia. "We want people to see us for who we are."

I got to meet my new friend Dalia after the event.  She asked me about my perception of Qatar thus far, and I told her honestly-it is so different from Saudi. I felt comfortable here and there was a real sense of openness.  But she knew, before I mentioned it, what really bothered me about Saudi.

"They treat their women so bad!"

Despite the two countries coming from the same tribes, same families, and same Wahhabi faith, the differences could not be more stark.  Here women chose to wear an abaya, at least at a legal level.  I don't know enough to judge about social pressure, but I assume it's pretty high.  I never felt disrespected by a Qatari man like in Saudi when they would cut in front of me in line or refuse to ride the elevator with me. The girls could play sports-we visited Aspire sports complex, which trains Qataris to be pro athletes and watched women do gymnastics in short shorts and spandex in front of men.  No way that would have ever flew in Saudi. 

Dalia's point about being perceived for the person and not the appearance  was driven home in the car later that day by one of the male SAISers, who tried to say she had to live with people perceiving her a certain way because she chose her appearance and how she presented herself to the world.  This started a heated debate when just about everyone tried to get him to realize she just wanted to be judged not on her appearance but on her intellect.  Basically, he said she should change if she wanted to be taken seriously.  This is the same guy who made the "joke" about women being over empowered. 

What about me, I asked. When I worked on the Hill, I was often dismissed for being just a silly, perhaps a bit pretty girl. It was "cute" that I wanted to work in politics, in international affairs, in the Middle East, on defense issues. 

I was chatting with a family member once who asked what I did-nursing or teaching.  Neither.  I said I graduated from GWU with a degree in international relations and worked for Congress.  As a secretary? No, as a legislative assistant. Loved watching him eat his words, but the fact remains girls like me have an extremely difficult time being taken seriously.

He answered I should have changed the way I talked, the way I spoke, and the way I presented myself.  Seeing as I dressed like a 35 year old boring woman, spoke like everyone else, and acted with an extremely serious demeanor, I'm not sure what else I could have done. I was all business. It was so bad that I didn't own non-work clothes.  There is a photo of me at the beach wearing a knee length black skirt.  Makes me cringe every time I see it.

I'm a mean pain in the ass, I said.  There was no way anyone could have credibly misjudged me as a silly girl.

Everyone laughed because it's true. 

NOTE: I did not use real names.

Stuff Qataris say

At a meeting with the Qatari Majlis al-Shura, the Consultative Assembly, we asked what the most pressing domestic concern is.  The answer? Things are perfect in Qatar.  There are no problems. 


Probably a bit of an overstatement. There is a lot of tension between native Qataris and foreigners or second generation-ers.  


We also had a meeting with the Qatar Investment Authority, the country's sovereign wealth fund. Plenty of gems in that meeting:

"We love food," when asked about investments in Africa that are criticized as taking arable land from poor farmers.


"I don't believe in food security," when asked if those investments were made to secure a food supply for the Qatari people.


"We don't need it.  The government has plenty of money,"when asked what they do with their profits (reinvest).


"They go to mosques and steal people's money," about the Iranians.


"You are safe, the American army is here."

This far Qatar reminds me a lot of Singapore.  Everything is new, shiny, and runs well.  Huge expat community and a degree of social openness.  Both countries' governments are by no stretch of the imagination democratic.  But they seem to have enough money, allow enough relative freedom, and provide for their people well enough to keep people happy.  


It's incredible how different Qatar is from Saudi.  Both are Wahhabi but, wow.  A the Majlis the representatives said of course they support the openness-no one would want to come here or work here or do business if they were closed.


This morning I went running.  And everyone is so nice.  It's incredible. 

Boys and girls

The separation of girls and boys is definitely beginning to take a toll on our group dynamics.  I get the feeling some of the boys think its funny, but many of the girls are beginning to get frustrated. Yesterday we went to the University of Dammam,  a mixed campus with separate facilities. We met with students, both genders in the same room but separated by a sign and each sitting on opposite sides.  At the end of the meeting, we broke out into smaller groups and just informally chatted with our peers of the same gender.  The girls were awesome.  We chatted about music, dating/marriage, and school.  

I am not sure if it's appropriate to really detail what they said because I don't want to break their confidence, but in general things are changing a bit.  One girl said she delayed engagement and marriage until she graduated, and another said she really didn't even want to start thinking about it because she is so focused on school.  Additionally, they said they were held to a higher standard academically because girls are stereotypically academically better than boys. They just want to be taught the same curriculum as the boys.

After our meeting, though, the boys made plans with the Saudis for lunch and of course we could not join them.  We had to go back to the hotel-I find that we are spending an incredible amount of time in the hotel.  We couldn't go to where they have lunch, can't smoke sheesha (not an issue for me, but some of the girls would like to), can't work out to get rid of some of our negative energy.  It's only a couple of days, but you can really see the institutionalization of gender discrimination.  

Honestly, I'm a bit disappointed about how quickly some of the boys seem to embrace this and how willing and without a second thought some just leave us behind.  I have only seen one make an active effort to include us.  And he is the only one I have heard say anything along the lines of how they treat women is ridiculous.  I've only heard jokes from the others. Hahaha, lunch was so awesome. Hahaha, the pool was so nice. Hahaha, oh that massage was amaaaazing. 

While the boys went out to lunch, a handful of the girls begged our guide Saad to take us out. We went for a walk on the corniche, which was nice. The weather was actually pleasant by the sea.  And then the boys came back saying how amazing their lunch was, without one mention of oh, I'm sorry you couldn't join.

I hope no one is offended by this post. I admit I am being a bit sensitive, and i do not mean to complain.  Amy for instance, is good with dealing with this and just laughs it off. But there's no point in sharing my experiences if I'm not honest with how I'm feeling and my experiences.  No one will learn anything if I just relay the positive points of the trip. 

We all later met up and went to this bizarre mini air and space museum and then saw an IMAX film about the deep sea.  I have a feeling that was just time filler.  We went to the mall and walked around a bit, and then the girls went back to the hotel (naturally) while the boys went out with the Saudis. Amy, Brit, Michelle, and I sat out in the lobby for a few hours, hanging out, and eventually the guys came back.  We all hung out for a few hours. Until 3am, actually.  

Everyone says Jedda will be better for the girls, more fun for us. Even if it is, I am still really disappointed about the behavior over the past few days. 

Im on the bus to our next stop, Jubail, and one of the boys just said we empower our girls too much in the West. It was meant to be a joke. He was talking about how white guys don't like white girls and date Asians because they are more submissive.  I had to tell him to stop.  

Ugh, wow. That literally hurt me inside. 

Adam, Eve, and dinosaurs

Walking through a museum in Riyadh this afternoon, I was struck to see fossils, a dinosaur skeleton, and a prehistoric timeline, side-by-side with a display on how the earth was created (a pretty scientific description). In the United States, there is a heated debate between creationism and evolution. Many think there is no middle ground. The most dogmatic of the Americans believe the earth was created in six days, which doesn't quite jibe with evidence from a ore-human era with dinosaurs. As Saudi is considered a bit of a dogmatic place, I turned to our guide and asked him what the consensus or general understanding of this issue is in Saudi-did Adam and Eve walk the earth with dinosaurs, or did the dinosaurs come first, adding thousands of years to the six-day timeline.

Faris just looked at me blankly. There were dinosaurs, of course. So I asked him, does that mean Adam and Eve lived at the same time as dinosaurs. He was stunned. The thought had just never crossed his mind. God created heaven and the earth as described. But of course it doesn't really make sense that humans coexisted with dinosaurs-it's doubtful Adam and Eve would have lived long enough to populate the earth. But putting the two together, contemplating the impact each narrative. It was this stunning moment where I could literally see change and a different way of thinking emerging. So crazy.

On the one hand, it's better than in some places in the States where people dont believe in any degree of evolution. Despite Saudi's dogmatism (is that a word?), its students are taught evolution. But the failure of the education system to teach any kind of critical thinking or build the capability to make the connection between these two issues, even presented side by side...wow.

On a lighter note, the museum labeled the Persian Gulf as the Arabian Gulf. Chuckle chuckle chuckle, that is not what it's called, sillies.

Breakfast and lunch were absurdly good. Without access to a gym, I'm going to have to be literally rolled off the plane. Chocolate and white chocolate fondu station, amazing fruit, salad, cereal, etc selection for breakie. INCREDIBLE grilled fish, lobster, chicken, salmon, prawns, fruit, steamed broccoli, salads, desserts, sushi, pastas, hot dishes for lunch. Man oh man.

Tonight we were hosted by Dr. Salsa al-Hazza a prominent women's rights activist. Her children and their friends attended the event too.

I always caution against making generalizations about Arab women being oppressed. Veiled or not, if you see them in action in a market or at home, you know it is really them who wear the proverbial pants. She told her husband to tell us what he does, what his work was. His response? I am a husband. Priceless.

I spoke with her at the end of the night about conceptions of women and women's issues in the Middle East as described in the West. And she said what is basically my understanding, which is that, look. Change had to be homegrown to be sustainable. It has to come from the Saudis and the Egyptians and the Moroccans. I has to happen their way, at their own pace. I think she was a little more forgiving of the status who than I would be (even in America) but in general I think Western involvement in these kinds of changes are only detrimental and cause the issue and those linked with it to be considered foreign ,thereby losing legitimacy in the eyes of the very people they need to win over.

I agree with her that we khawagas should not be involved. But she kept on referring to wearing the abaya as a a choice, which it is not. And I can not tell you how many times I've seen a young Arab lady walk into a house, hotel, or cafe and rip off whatever outer garment she's wearing and discard it with obvious disdain.

And for the he record, were the abaya not mandatory I probably would have happily bought one to be respectful of the culture. I have two Moroccan jellabas and a handful of Indian tunics. I love that kind of dress. But because it's mandatory I think back to those girls I see obviously hating it and get angry.

I've heard a lot of comments from some in the group about well, maybe the abaya is kind of nice. You don't have to worry about what you're wearing, it makes life easier. But for us this is four days. It isn't almost like playing dress up. But for some women, like the ones tossing off their abayas, or in the case of Saudi doing little things to show their rebellion against the abaya by leaving it open, etc., this is life and may not be so fun.